Changing room lighting makes you feel bad about your face, body, and life choices

Your astrological week ahead for November 15th, with Psychic Bob

Oh, like you've never pretended to be a high-ranking admiral at a Remembrance event

Christmas lights going up a chilling harbinger of horror to come

The Archbishop of Canterbury on… Wes Streeting, yeah that should fix the f**king problem

BBC issues amber Children In Need warning

Storm 'gets some people wet'

Sussan Ley Says Party Is Totally Committed to Paris Framework for Achieving Net Zero, Except for the Bit About Achieving Net Zero

My dream is to meet a pissed, middle-aged British woman. By Timothée Chalamet

I merely had a nice chat with an ex-employee while never enquiring into her hellish situation, Trump explains

Jagged Little Pill, and other breakup albums that make you wish they’d lived happily ever after

Wanking never loses its sparkle, 98-year-old confirms

'We met on LinkedIn and run marathons together': The six worst types of modern couple

Difference between Foster's and piss narrows further

Sorry for being lying, state-owned fifth-column gay Hampstead Marxists: my draft apology for the BBC

5 Reasons To Watch Anjelah Johnson-Reyes’ Special “Diganme Que No”

Trump Asks Staff for List of Potential Countries To Bomb To Distract From Epstein Emails

Boyfriend can hear bra unhooking from five rooms away

Licence payers thank Daily Telegraph for costing them a billion dollars

Man afraid his 12-year marriage is a romance scam

Dismay as Booker prize once again won by book

How on earth are my 22 St George's flags intimidating? By a disingenuous twat

The big question: what can the different party leaders do for your tits?

Trump's BBC libel suit: how it wouldn't work

Kicking Starmer out is a pleasure reserved for us, electorate tells Streeting

I paid £4,150 to see the Northern Lights in 2018, and I feel a right twat now

Waitrose Christmas ad is pay-per-view