How dare Tim Houston ruin my child’s favourite summer activity: burning down the province of Nova Scotia

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Trump demands 20% gratuity for selling Ukraine to Putin

As strike looms, Air Canada thrilled to have new excuse to cancel flights

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Deacon Blue, and other bands you'd happily forgotten until the Guardian dredged them up

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Billionaire with doomsday bunker wants you to know AI is great

DHS Offers $1,000 Stipend To Migrants Who Voluntarily Self-Destruct

I probably did something to it says man whose back just like that now

Disgusted God Puts Giant Overturned Glass Atop Humanity

Alan Dershowitz Sues Farmers Market Vendor For Refusing To Sell Him Child

Frito-Lay CEO Gifts Trump Gold Funyun

Care home forced to cancel wet T-shirt contest due to hosepipe ban

Mobile phone more powerful than computer that sent man to the Moon unable to cope with 30-degree heat

'Child lockdown initiated': How to refer to everything in bullshit 'amber alert' jargon

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We ask you: what else should over-70s with poor vision be banned from doing?

New Taylor Swift album includes diss track about you