Looking for a holiday read that actively lowers your intelligence? Take inspiration from the shite your retired mother claims to enjoy:

The Cornish WW2 Midwife Wedding at the Primrose Cottage Bookshop

It's 1941, and Grace Wood-Morris, a talented midwife, is delivering adorable babies and keeping spirits up through the Blitz. But she's distracted by a handsome Newquay bookshop owner with an endless supply of tea and Jane Austen novels.

My Forbidden Mob Boss Love

Lucy Parry, the sheltered daughter of a Mafia boss, falls for the tattooed enforcer son of his greatest rival. Complications arise when she secretly hooks up with his brother and catches the eye of a sensitive Yakuza enforcer. Will she follow her heart?

Murder With Mayo in the Garden Centre Café

In this cosy crime caper, grouchy pensioner Margaret Gerving teams up with the spotty teen behind the exotic fish counter to solve the violent bludgeoning death of a wealthy garden gnome magnate, all penned by one of the Chasers from The Chase.

The Farmer’s Plough Girl

Rural Ireland, 1890. Red-haired beauty Mary Fisher dreams of escaping her spiteful stepmother and six vile stepsisters. When she falls pregnant out of wedlock, her life turns into a series of extremely Catholic cruelties, including nuns making her pull a plough with her teeth.

Second Chances at the Swordfish Taverna

Recently widowed Donna Sheridan goes to Greece to scatter her husband’s ashes and finds love again after accidentally flashing a boob at sexy bar owner Yiannis, who teaches her how to love and laugh once more in broken, sexy English.

Full Moon Reaming, book three of the I Banged A Werewolf saga

Emma discovers her boyfriend Clark is a werewolf fighting an ancient war against vampires, fairies, gnomes, mummies, and zombies. But why is she so attracted to the new pixie in her life?

The Dead Don’t Leave Answerphone Messages

Ex-copper Carolyn Ryan thinks her dark past hunting Manchester-based serial killers is over. But a phone call from her long-dead commanding officer pulls her back into the terror she thought she had left behind in a rain-slick alley in Crumpsall.