Following a surprising surge in the party's popularity, internal pollsters at One Nation have been forced to move on from tracking their primary vote with their fingers.
According to the latest polls, the minor party now ranks above the Liberals, who are as popular as running your tongue along a cheese grater. However, the spike has caused a major shakeup for Pauline Hanson's team, who previously didn't know numbers as high as 22 existed.
"Here at One Nation we believe in traditional values, so we've always used a traditional analog base-10 hand-assisted system for counting," explained a spokesperson.
"But lately things are out of control. When we said we needed Barnaby to join for the extra hands, we meant it literally."
Pollsters within the party are currently on their toes testing new methods. "We sampled with counting sheep for a while, but that proved to have adverse effects," said one drowsy staffer.
Analysts have speculated that, come election time, this surge could result in One Nation gaining as many as three new calculators for the office.
Source: The Shovel (AUS)