In what has been described as a cruel and unnecessarily harsh punishment, Erin Patterson will spend the next two decades listening to podcasts hosted by people who once Googled ‘what is a death cap?’ and now consider themselves experts in toxicology.

The sentencing was met with rampant fervour from the hosts of The Mushroom Cook, The Mushroom Trial, The Trial of Erin Patterson, The Case of: Erin Patterson, Mushroom Murders, Mushroom Case Daily, and Erin Patterson: True Story, who all released a new 50-minute episode to explain the news, which could have otherwise been described in 12 seconds.

“Your behaviour shows the highest of contempt for all that our society holds sacred; it is morally reprehensible,” the judge told the two dozen podcasters inside Erin’s courtroom.

“As for Ms Patterson, between sentencing her to life or to listen to podcasts about her crimes, I simply chose the longer option.”

Patterson broke down after the sentence was revealed, pleading with the judge for leniency. “Please, just give me the death penalty. I’ll eat my own Beef Wellington. Anything but this!” she said.