An outwardly normal couple have decided to have not one, not two, not three, but four children, it has emerged.

Stephen and Carolyn Ryan of Nottingham have four offspring, but all appear to have been conceived, birthed, and raised without their parents showing signs of derangement or cult involvement.

Neighbor Nathan Muir said: “Initially, we assumed they had some kind of contraceptive mishap at least twice, but apparently they really did choose to have this many children.

“They do normal things like going to work, taking the kids swimming, going on a family holiday every year. Frankly, it’s creepy how they act like there’s nothing wrong.

“Sometimes they even seem happy about this waking nightmare they’ve created for themselves. Surely one day they’ll both snap and set fire to their seven-seater Citroën?”

Family friend Nicola Hollis said: “It’s weird. They’re not religious and they know about contraception. I’d understand if they were parenting influencers getting lucrative washing powder deals, but it’s like they enjoy having kids or something.”

Youngest son Oliver said: “I’d like to have more brothers and sisters, but mummy said ‘No, there’s a limit to how many times I can watch Bluey, so f**k that’.”