The EU is humorously demanding a 'Farage clause' in trade deals, leading the UK to propose its own set of Farage-related clauses. These include compelling Farage to perform his duties if elected as an MP, as residents of Clacton, Essex have noticed no difference with or without their MP.

Another clause suggests that the Farage you vote for may be substituted with a lesser bigot, reflecting the experience of voters who ended up with an incompetent local authority. There's also a warning that prolonged exposure to Farage may cause damage to personal relationships, as some may find themselves alienated and alone, with only a Union Jack for company.

Close friendships with figures like Trump and Musk are non-refundable, even as their reputations grow more controversial. Reform MPs may have their status rescinded at any time, highlighting the non-democratic nature of the organization. Lastly, there's a retroactive clause for Brexit, suggesting it may differ from what was ordered, and encouraging everyone to read the fine print.